“Oops, I Killed It Again.”

Harris

I ain’t know Justin left his kid in the car while he was sexxxting me those naughty things. Shit, I didn’t even know he had a kid at all. I was too hypnotized by them office dick pics he was sending my way. I guess he couldn’t keep it real with me: He was busy wanking off to the thought of me while his own son was frying in the car. What a shame. Too pre-occupied with my website and licking the screen that you can’t even be a rational father.

You see, I was in between the making of a twerk video when he started blowing me up. I sent back one photo and he snapped. He felt that magic sensation that I invoked with my body. He was so thirsty I could hear him howling. But it’s not my fault what happened. I take no blame. I could’ve done without him texting me in the first place so don’t even think about turning this into some highly publicized Monica Lewinsky type scandal. Because I’ll pull that black Dolce & Gabbana dress out of the closet so fucking quick and the hit the camera lights on the way to court.